Author Archives: josh-in-reel-life

About josh-in-reel-life

Often disgruntled blogger.

This Means War

Wake at 9am after night spent dreaming rather explicitly homoerotic dreams. Self often dreams such dreams, but dreams typically feature hardbodies such as Ryan Reynolds, Tom Cruise and Mel Gibson (who count as fair game), rather than real life people … Continue reading

Posted in *, 2012 | Tagged , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , | Leave a comment

High Fidelity

Self’s desert island, all-time, top five most memorable wake-ups, in chronological order are as follows: Tearlessly birthing from self’s mother with medically undiagnosed addiction to alcohol and cigarettes and Ryan Reynolds films, quilted in chicken batter Stirring in top tier … Continue reading

Posted in ****, 2000 | Tagged , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , | 1 Comment

JCVD

Wake at 9.30am show-worn and sweat-drained after week of rioting (self obviously wasn’t part of riots [since self prefers stealing hearts rather than plasma screen televisions], but self was caught near riots [since self lives in Peckham]) and performing in … Continue reading

Posted in ***, 2008 | Tagged , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , | 1 Comment

Morning Glory

Wake at 10am in morning feeling glorious, refreshed and prepared to vanquish illness developed yesterday whilst rehearsing Noël Coward play and drinking rosé on National Theatre balcony with non-flatmate ex-workmate Valentina. Self watches season two of The Wire whilst prepping … Continue reading

Posted in ****, 2010 | Tagged , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , | 1 Comment

The Life of David Gale

Arrive back at new flat at 8pm. Self is weary, broken, emotionally drained like formally-wet-now-stone-cold-dry sponge. Flat seems quiet which self prefers as self far too exhausted to speak to other humans. Self unrobes, throws clothes to corner, clambers into … Continue reading

Posted in ****, 2003 | Tagged , , , , , , , , , , , , , | Leave a comment

Bad Teacher

Wake (badly) at 9am by noise of lecture about early rising given by teacher father. (Self’s father actually headteacher but word gaming in blog posts often fails to work if self entirely accurate.) (Rethinking occurs whereby self concludes that “Wake … Continue reading

Posted in ***, 2011 | Tagged , , , , , , , , , , , , | Leave a comment

Alien: Resurrection

Erect self from bed at 10am. Self marginally inert after late night spent trying to understand Alien³ and watching countless episodes of brilliant AMC series Breaking Bad on laptop whilst in bed. Self brews dangerously strong coffee and consumes coffee with black … Continue reading

Posted in **, 1997 | Tagged , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , | Leave a comment

Alien³

Wake at 9am. In reality, self woke at 10.30am, but typing 9am looks better. Whilst updating blog with Aliens post, self engages in viewing of episode from Aaron Sorkin’s collapsed television show Studio 60 on the Sunset Strip. Self has taken to … Continue reading

Posted in **, 1992 | Tagged , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , | Leave a comment

Aliens

Wake at 9am with design to go on morning jog through wooded area near house before traveling to central London to continue writing almost-forgotten-certainly-under-nurtured play about state of literary criticism which self hopes will make self rich and famous before … Continue reading

Posted in ***, 1986 | Tagged , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , | Leave a comment

Alien

Return home from work at 10pm absolutely convinced that self and large portion of mankind will suffer death by splintery extra-terrestrial rock fingers of 390 metre wide asteroid named Apophis in 2036. Fears attributed to small sized article in The … Continue reading

Posted in ****, 1979 | Tagged , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , | Leave a comment

The Guardian

Wake at 1.30am on night bus following audition for play destined for Camden Fringe Festival. Self in no state to bed down as adrenaline and alcohol surging through bloodstream after entire day spent in pub interacting with old (though younger … Continue reading

Posted in **, 2006 | Tagged , , , , , , , , , , , , , , | 1 Comment

Life as a House (et al)

Wake at 6.30am. Sleep. Wake at 7am. Sleep. Wake at 7.04am. Sleep. Wake at 8.30am. Alarm noise from encased-in-pink iPhone 3GS causes creeping sense of possibility of nervous disorder developing so decide finally to tip self from bed onto floor … Continue reading

Posted in ****, 2001 | Tagged , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , | Leave a comment

Podcast Episode 2 10/09/10

Wake unexpectedly early at 9am. Realise following investigation that early rise due to flashing reminder on phone. Strange. Self does not remember using reminder function on mobile communication device to create reminder. Remember suddenly that last time self was in … Continue reading

Posted in Notifications | Tagged | 1 Comment

American Beauty

My name is self. This is my blog. This is (very much) my life. I am twenty-three years old, in less than a year (chances are), I’ll be dead. But, of course, I don’t know that (for a fact) yet. … Continue reading

Posted in *****, 1999 | Tagged , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , | 1 Comment

Podcast Episode 1 27/08/10

Wake at 10am as have meeting later with non-flatmate workmate Tom to record first ever podcast. Self terrified, but excited. Hope podcast will become reoccurring feature on blog, especially since self now watches only Simon Amstell YouTube clips and episodes … Continue reading

Posted in Notifications | Tagged | Leave a comment

The Patriot

Wake at 9.30am with bed guest. Am irresistibly drawn to laptop to check comment updates on new blogging site. Find majority of comments from self mother. Self mother apparently promoting blog to school children. Feedback severe as schoolchildren think self … Continue reading

Posted in ***, 2000 | Tagged , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , | 2 Comments

Notification of Completed Transition

Self has completed transition from rusty old blog that does not allow comments at blogger.com (www.josh-in-reel-life.blogspot.com) to shiny new big-image-of-self-above-blog-entries-incorporating blog at wordpress.com. Self has developed Judas complex, but self undergoing punishment in form of limited font access on new … Continue reading

Posted in Notifications | Tagged , | 3 Comments

Knight and Day

Wake at 11am after (day of light) and night of heaving drinking with non-flatmate workmate Lydia and non-flatmate old friend Jimmy at hallowed tavern on Strand. Evening culminated in reading of play self amalgamated from pre-existing Harold Pinter plays drawn … Continue reading

Posted in ***, 2010 | Tagged , , , , , , , , , , | 1 Comment

Kick-Ass

Following numbing experience offered by The Joneses, decide that self due film viewing that self knows congenial in advance. Load Jonathan-Ross-wife-scripted presumably jolly film Kick Ass onto VLC player. Create elaborate chicken/ham/tomato/cucumber/olive/lettuce/spinach/cheese/oregano/salt salad and enjoy by-now-well-known underdog plot of kid deciding … Continue reading

Posted in ***, 2010 | Tagged , , , , , , , | Leave a comment

The Joneses

Wake at 10.30am to rave ringtone cranking out of mobile communication device. Ignore and return to state of slumber as device too far away from bed. Wake at 11.30am and return missed call from flatmate Johnny. Hopeful that flatmate Johnny … Continue reading

Posted in **, 2009 | Tagged , , , , , , , , , , | Leave a comment